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Balance | Fulfillment | Peace of Mind

Billie Eilish on Letting Go of Control

Updated: Jan 31



Billie Eilish is known for breaking multiple records, like being the first woman and the youngest person to win 4 main Grammy categories.


Eilish has also helped to break down stigma associated with mental health struggles.


She’s opened up about being diagnosed with Tourette's syndrome when she was 11 years old.


She’s also shared, “I go through a lot of depression...I know other people do, too.”


By being so open, Eilish has taken a proactive approach in shaping how others see her.


“I like to be in control of how I look and how I feel and how I act," Eilish stated.


As such, one of the biggest lessons she’s still learning is letting go.


In an interview with Allure, she said “I do this thing where it seems like it’s good to find out all the things that are going to hurt you the most because when you know all of it, then you can have a sense of control about it. And once you know, you can heal from that. Then I’m invincible!


“But what I’ve learned...is that time goes by, and I’m still scarred. You don’t have to push into pain to get out of pain. I’ve done that, and I don’t want to do it again...


“You don't have to push into pain to get out of pain.”

- Billie Eilish


“There was this moment when I was in Paris, we were driving around, and I was in a bad place... And this motorcycle pulled up next to the car, and this guy’s helmet had a sticker on it that said in all caps, ‘MOVE ON.’ I was sitting there like, Oh. Message received...


“I have a really big problem with control...so I’ve been trying to teach myself that there are things out of your control and you have to move on.”


In his book, Food for the Heart, meditation teacher, Ajahn Chah, describes holding on like a heavy rock we’ve carried for so long that it becomes a part of us. It is only when the rock makes us exhausted and weak that we realize we have to let it go.


Holding on is like a heavy rock we’ve carried for so long that it becomes a part of us. It is only when the rock makes us exhausted and weak that we realize we have to let it go.


Psychotherapist, Ilene Strauss Cohen, states, “When deciding to let go, we focus on changing what we can control, our perspective. We feel hopeless and powerless when we focus on changing what we can’t. By shifting that focus, we regain power and release ourselves from an emotional prison.”


For Billie Eilish, her focus now is refusing to settle.


“I’ve settled for less than I deserved, and I’m not going to do that anymore...the more I think about being myself, the better my life is. The more I am myself, the better my life is.”


Are you ready to let go?


If you are, contact us for a free consult at RosannaHo.ca

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